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Thread: A Baked Tater

  1. #1

    A Baked Tater

    **A Short Non Descript Dwarf wearing only that of a Red Thong comes wandering down stairs as the Evening Crowd begins to crowd into the Tavern. Folks watch as the 3 foot high warrior pads across the floor in barefeet to the bar. The Bartender seeing him coming reaches over the bar and hands Tater a tall cold glass of Frothy Milk and a saucer with 2 Chocolate Chip Cookies. All watch with certain amusement as this childlike Dwarf slams the milk back stuffs his face with the cookies and belches..............ACK!!!**

    CUT!!!!

    <Director> Belch , BELCH how many times i gotta tell ya Tater! Belch.!!!

    "Sorry i keep gettin my functions fused, all a Tater wants to do is dance!!" Taters says.

    **Milk coated beard filled with crumbs, Tater barely reaching the bar sets his glass and saucer up on the counter rolling his eyes at the director pads across the floor to the makeshift stage. All eyes on Tater now some old and some new as he does a couple stretches. Tater reaches out and grabs the pole in the middle of the Stage**

    ##MUSIC PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND AS Tater Spins on the Pole##

    Traveling in a fried-out combie
    On a hippie trail, head full of zombie
    I met a strange lady, she made me nervous
    She took me in and gave me breakfast
    And she said,

    "Do you come from a land down under?
    Where women glow and men plunder?
    Can't you hear, can't you hear the thunder?
    You better run, you better take cover."

    Buying bread from a man in Brussels
    He was six foot four and full of muscles
    I said, "Do you speak-a my language?"
    He just smiled and gave me a vegemite sandwich
    And he said,

    "I come from a land down under
    Where beer does flow and men chunder
    Can't you hear, can't you hear the thunder?
    You better run, you better take cover."

    Lying in a den in Bombay
    With a slack jaw, and not much to say
    I said to the man, "Are you trying to tempt me
    Because I come from the land of plenty?"
    And he said,

    "Oh! Do you come from a land down under? (oh yeah yeah)
    Where women glow and men plunder?
    Can't you hear, can't you hear the thunder?
    You better run, you better take cover."


    "Get on up here folks Give it up for lil Old Tater!! I accept all Major CC and you can leave your tips in that jar there!!" Tater Yells over the music as he dances to the Rythmn. " Co mere ya all and drop a gold piece fer the Tater.!!!"

    ** Watching several of the occupants turn away as if abou tto lose it all, Tater Laughs and turns his back to the audience and does a short(pun intended) booty shake**

    "Cmon folks kep the Tater in Milk and Cookies!!"

    **and so once again the entertainment for Misty Hollow begins again for the evening**










    #

  2. #2

    Bl-inks

    <Blinks>

  3. #3
    Ya know... I will never listen to that song again... Thank you very much Tater....
    "If the earth were flesh, then it would bleed our blood." -Tiger
    TigerForce.net

  4. #4

    Navic

    <blinks>

  5. #5
    Slo... My friend... Stop staring... You'll go blind man.... <Throws this hood up over his elven ears to block out the horrific site caused by the dwarf>

    Really, someone should put a leash on that thing....
    "If the earth were flesh, then it would bleed our blood." -Tiger
    TigerForce.net

  6. #6

    Permit

    "Ok Ok ,, I need to see a permit!!, for the Stage of course...."

    <Rubs eyes to clear the Picture>

    "Dam tiger,, I cant unsee it,, I cant unsee it",,

    <Runs out of the Tavern clawing at his eyes screaming into the evening>

  7. #7
    <watches Slo run out the tavern, understanding just how he feels> Really.... We'll need to post a warning at the door... "Cautionwarf wearing red thong within. Enter at your own risk"

    Somone should have warned me... <Shivers as I walk out the tavern door after Slo, mumbling something under his breath about dwarves need to be kept in the caves where they belong>
    "If the earth were flesh, then it would bleed our blood." -Tiger
    TigerForce.net

  8. #8
    <Watches Tig & Slo run outt'a the tav... carries his mug of ale and a fresh glass of milk up to the stage... >
    Ahh don't worry 'bout them Tater <places the glass of milk on the stage, takes a long drink of ale>
    After I recovered from the initial shock of you and your thong, I realized, your not so bad... my pappy use to say two things... <finishes his ale>
    "Boy, you look a man in the eyes when you talk to 'em", and "If you don't do dem chores I'll have ya shaving Granny's back!".
    Well I shaved Granny's back... twice.. it wasn't pretty...

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