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Thread: Stewed Tater

  1. #1

    Stewed Tater

    * A short Non descript dwarf sporting a brand new Red Thong Steps up on the Stage Patrons of the Tavern stare wide eyed and open mouthed as the little dwarf grabs the polished pole and starts a rapid spin while a tune starts and rises in cresendo beat*

    "I like to move it move it" Tater sings gruf and loud as he dances to a familiar tune (Madagascar King Dance)

    *Short Limbs work frantically to keep pace with the beat set by the tune*

    "Thats it everyone come join the Tater while i shake me money maker."

  2. #2
    The Halfling goes outside to keep the patrons from fleeing,,...I mean to drum up some new business.

    "Come one come all! See what everyone this side of the planar divide is talking about! Is he a Dwarf or is he a MAD DANCING MACHINE???"

    "See his combination of sensual erotic movements coupled with a rumba beat. SEE HIM MOVE THAT THING LIKE NO ONE"S EVER MOVED A THONG BEFORE!!!"

    "Only a 2 gold cover charge.
    (holds out hand)

  3. #3
    (walks back inside)

    "Tater, the crowds aren't coming."

    (scratches chin)

    "We need a hook. A dwarf in a red thong isn't shocking anymore."


    "Maybe you need a partner. Ever consider a partner? I can look a few people up..."

  4. #4
    <a short non-descript dwarf wearing a fur lined red thong swings sexily around in a tight circle. His stubby little fingers straining to grasp the pole in the center of the custom built dance platform. Soft rhythm of Land Down Under playing magically in the back ground>

    "Tis true my friend. It has been slow of late here. It is gettin so a dwarf cant ford milks anymore. Whats this place coming to. I have haf a mind to Start doing a full monty show to see if that gets stirred up." after a moment adds."Sigh, i miss that young flower girl. likely young lass , with a lass like that , no pun intended, we could keep them coming in. Then theres be my dream babe the Cyren wench. She justs be making me bloods boil. Not seens her in ages."

    "thinking maybe me should start streaking from one tavern to the next with a signs on me back pointing folks this ways. What do you think my friend? want a glass of milk? not much else to offer here but what there be, it be yours."

    <Short legs work feverishly to match the beat of the tune now playing, wheel in the sky.>

  5. #5
    "I'll pass on the milk."

    "Streaking has been done before. We need a new concept to bring in business."

    "Maybe an Open Stage Night where we can showcase talent (or lack thereof...)

    "THAT'S IT!! We can advertise a talent show and call it Yserbian Idol. Patrons will come in and make fools of themselves and we make fun of them!"

    "What do you think?"

  6. #6
    "hmm that sunds like funs to me. Maybe i can be a judge or better yet do a guest appearance as a dancer. maybe do a song,, "Did I shave my back for this" hmmm maybe i can be the mean judge with never a good thing to say. hmmm wonders if we cud get that flowergirl or Cyren to help juge the contest?"

    <The short non descript Dwarf scratched a grizzly chin thinking it over as a dozen ideas run through his head>

    "Umm we gonna have to get a extra milk cow, there gonna be lots of thirsty milk drinkers. Have to sell tickets at the door and raise a purse fer the winner. I think ye stumbled into a grand idea my friend. Wait till Navic hears of this. I will send dispatches immediately"

  7. #7

    "I'll get on ordering another cow. And we can charge double for drinks if we call it latte."

    "Let the word go forth."

  8. #8
    <Bursts thru the door kicking a rolling keg... a basket full of munchies in one hand... and a large decanter in the other>
    TATER 'ol friend! <spys the halfling>...and you, fire boy <gives him the evil eye>
    Tater, ya check this boy for flamables?
    <"Accidently" guides the rolling keg close to the halfling, nearly striking him. Then steers it to the bar and drops off the basket>
    I received your message... came as soon as I could... brought ya this.
    <Hands the decater to Tater>
    Got milk?
    So, what's the plan?

  9. #9
    (ignores keg coming DANGEROUSLY close to getting his velvet boots dirty)

    "Hello Navic. The stage you built hasn't fallen down...yet. So Tater and I are planning to boost business by having a little talent show for people trying to become the next Yserbian Idol."

    "Make a few gold, have a few laughs, the usual drill."

  10. #10
    <follows Navic in, carrying a cask of whiskey>

    Hey, did I hear Yserbius Idol? I'm in... I'll be Simon.. Hehehe...

    You all suck, I want more money... Oh, and my own show..

    "If the earth were flesh, then it would bleed our blood." -Tiger

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