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Stewed Tater

Tater

Inactive Members
#1
* A short Non descript dwarf sporting a brand new Red Thong Steps up on the Stage Patrons of the Tavern stare wide eyed and open mouthed as the little dwarf grabs the polished pole and starts a rapid spin while a tune starts and rises in cresendo beat*

"I like to move it move it" Tater sings gruf and loud as he dances to a familiar tune (Madagascar King Dance)

*Short Limbs work frantically to keep pace with the beat set by the tune*

"Thats it everyone come join the Tater while i shake me money maker."
 

Fleetwood

Message for Upgrade
#2
The Halfling goes outside to keep the patrons from fleeing,...er,...I mean to drum up some new business.

"Come one come all! See what everyone this side of the planar divide is talking about! Is he a Dwarf or is he a MAD DANCING MACHINE???"

"See his combination of sensual erotic movements coupled with a rumba beat. SEE HIM MOVE THAT THING LIKE NO ONE"S EVER MOVED A THONG BEFORE!!!"

"Only a 2 gold cover charge.
"
(holds out hand)
 

Fleetwood

Message for Upgrade
#3
(walks back inside)

"Tater, the crowds aren't coming."

(scratches chin)

"We need a hook. A dwarf in a red thong isn't shocking anymore."

"STOP DOING THAT WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU!!"

"Maybe you need a partner. Ever consider a partner? I can look a few people up..."
 

Tater

Inactive Members
#4
<a short non-descript dwarf wearing a fur lined red thong swings sexily around in a tight circle. His stubby little fingers straining to grasp the pole in the center of the custom built dance platform. Soft rhythm of Land Down Under playing magically in the back ground>

"Tis true my friend. It has been slow of late here. It is gettin so a dwarf cant ford milks anymore. Whats this place coming to. I have haf a mind to Start doing a full monty show to see if that gets stirred up." after a moment adds."Sigh, i miss that young flower girl. likely young lass , with a lass like that , no pun intended, we could keep them coming in. Then theres be my dream babe the Cyren wench. She justs be making me bloods boil. Not seens her in ages."

"thinking maybe me should start streaking from one tavern to the next with a signs on me back pointing folks this ways. What do you think my friend? want a glass of milk? not much else to offer here but what there be, it be yours."

<Short legs work feverishly to match the beat of the tune now playing, wheel in the sky.>
 

Fleetwood

Message for Upgrade
#5
"I'll pass on the milk."

"Streaking has been done before. We need a new concept to bring in business."

"Maybe an Open Stage Night where we can showcase talent (or lack thereof...)

"THAT'S IT!! We can advertise a talent show and call it Yserbian Idol. Patrons will come in and make fools of themselves and we make fun of them!"

"What do you think?"
 

Tater

Inactive Members
#6
"hmm that sunds like funs to me. Maybe i can be a judge or better yet do a guest appearance as a dancer. maybe do a song,, "Did I shave my back for this" hmmm maybe i can be the mean judge with never a good thing to say. hmmm wonders if we cud get that flowergirl or Cyren to help juge the contest?"

<The short non descript Dwarf scratched a grizzly chin thinking it over as a dozen ideas run through his head>

"Umm we gonna have to get a extra milk cow, there gonna be lots of thirsty milk drinkers. Have to sell tickets at the door and raise a purse fer the winner. I think ye stumbled into a grand idea my friend. Wait till Navic hears of this. I will send dispatches immediately"
 

Fleetwood

Message for Upgrade
#7
"Excellent!"

"I'll get on ordering another cow. And we can charge double for drinks if we call it latte."

"Let the word go forth."
 

Navic

Inactive Members
#8
<Bursts thru the door kicking a rolling keg... a basket full of munchies in one hand... and a large decanter in the other>
TATER 'ol friend! <spys the halfling>...and you, fire boy <gives him the evil eye>
Tater, ya check this boy for flamables? :roll:
<"Accidently" guides the rolling keg close to the halfling, nearly striking him. Then steers it to the bar and drops off the basket>
I received your message... came as soon as I could... brought ya this.
<Hands the decater to Tater>
Got milk? :D
So, what's the plan?
 

Fleetwood

Message for Upgrade
#9
(ignores keg coming DANGEROUSLY close to getting his velvet boots dirty)

"Hello Navic. The stage you built hasn't fallen down...yet. So Tater and I are planning to boost business by having a little talent show for people trying to become the next Yserbian Idol."

"Make a few gold, have a few laughs, the usual drill."
 

Tiger

Active Members
#10
<follows Navic in, carrying a cask of whiskey>

Hey, did I hear Yserbius Idol? I'm in... I'll be Simon.. Hehehe... 8)

You all suck, I want more money... Oh, and my own show..

LOL
 

Navic

Inactive Members
#11
Hello... Fleetwood...

I think ya's are on something here... a talent show is a great idea!

Tater, you should open the Grand Ballroom (Read: start a Talent Show tread). The stage and bar are alot bigger in there. Plus the giant disco globe maybe needed :p

We can all vote for the best performance (Read: Navic makes a new poll finally). :lol:
 

Fleetwood

Message for Upgrade
#12
Hold it there Navic.

You better let me handle the particulars. Tater probably has a different definition of "ballroom" then you and I.

(eyes the Dwarf grinding away)

Yup. I'm going to have to order more pole-cleaner....and some rubber gloves.
 

Tater

Inactive Members
#13
"Whats that? Huh? Grand Ballroom? No thank ya This Thong is just fine but thanks for the Compliment"

<Returns to Dancing the Short Non descript Dwarf Spins lazily while thinking of all the cold cold Milk that will be comsumed at the show>
 

Tiger

Active Members
#14
<sets the cask down on the bar, trying to avoid Tater's uh... >

I'll post some news in a few... Hehehe... God help the audiance...
 

Tater

Inactive Members
#15
<A Short Non Descript Dwarf Dressed Fully in a Furry Red Thong Shakes his money maker to "Land Down Under" as Tiger walks past with another Milk Cask>
.
"Hey!! Tiger!!!"Tater growls, " I'm playing our song buddy" Tater teases

"Watch me shake me money maker." Tater turns his rosey cheeks to tiger leans forward hands on stubby knees and proceeds to gyrate to the second verse, singing loudly,, "Are you trying to Tempt me"

" I gonna need help shaving me back for the contest? who can I get to help me" Stands and turns to find a volunteer.
 

Tiger

Active Members
#16
<Switches the cask to the other shoulder to block out the dwarf>

Ask Navic... I'm busy... Ya Sick lil man...

Man... Somone should really put a leash on that thing.. No, not the dwarf... The dwarfes... Nevermind.. <Goes out to the wagon to get the crates of peanuts>
 

slohand

Yserbian
Staff member
#17
hey!

****Walks into the Tavern and closes the door just as the near naked Dwarf as for volunteer to shave his back.****

<blinks>

**** Slohand wheels quickly and dives through a plate glass window and runs screaming into the evening****
 

Fleetwood

Message for Upgrade
#18
Tater said:
I gonna need help shaving me back for the contest? who can I get to help me" Stands and turns to find a volunteer.
"WHAT'S THAT NAVIC??? YOU SAY YOU NEED HELP PUTTING UP PLACARDS?? I'D BE HAPPY TO HELP!"

(runs into the night)
 
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